We Need a Strategic Miata Reserve

Despite Mazda Motor Corporation's gallant efforts, we will one day reach Peak Miata; the moment when we reach the maximum availability of the brilliant small Japanese roadster. From that moment to eternity, the number of Miatas will become smaller, and smaller, and smaller, descending a bell curve until only Mafia hitmen can afford them. We can reject this future, but we have to act. We must create a strategic Miata reserve.

According to Mazda, over 920,000 Miatas have been extracted from the manufacturing facilities of Japan, and rumors suggest that a new reserve, referred to by insiders as the ND formation, will greatly increase the known availability of Miatas. But these quantities are finite, and will be exhausted. Everyone hopes the Mazda board of directors will fund exploration efforts for a fifth Miata field, but we cannot count on that. Nor can we count on others to extract our small, affordable sports cars. Even the combined might of Toyota and Subaru have failed to refine a roadster from their reserves, and the Honda field dried up long ago.

It may raise prices slightly, it may seem legitimize the act of garage-queening, but placing a small percentage of our Miatas deep underground, safe from the threat of war, natural disasters, and energy drinks, will ensure an adequate supply of Miatas should the unthinkable happen. As the reserve grows, so will security in the minds of current and future Miata owners, confident that their, indeed our, way of life can survive any calamity.

Current sites worldwide would make fine locations for the reserve. The to-be-completed Yucca Mountain Nuclear Waste Repository would provide secure storage for centuries, if not millennia, along with a United States Air Force presence to provide security. The Creighton nickel mine in Ontario, Canada, currently being deepened to 10,000 feet below the surface, would also provide adequate protection. South Africa TauTona mine, the deepest mine in the world, is another candidate, though proper heat-shielding would be needed to protect the clear-coat from the 55 °C temperatures.

We have the need, we have the Miatas, and we have a bounty of potential locations; now we need the world, so dependent on Miatas for the continuation of our way of life, to commit to this effort. Call your congressman, your MP, your sultan; tell them to help build the Strategic Miata Reserve, for the good of humainty