This Is Why You Don't Paint Your Volvo While High On Bath Salts

Kids, listen up. If someone ever offers you a jar full of blue pills or a bag full of something called "smack," just say no I'll think about it. The thing is, some day you might have a well tuned paint gun, an air compressor, a selection of leftover rainbow paint supplies, and, critically, a vintage Volvo canvas.

Suddenly, that 35mm film capsule full of PCP that was undoubtedly smuggled in at least three persons butt cracks becomes an integral part of your afternoon and when I say afternoon, what I really mean is three days that end up with you forgetting the first two and naked in a desert running away from snakes that have human toe nails for scales and hiss the Swedish National anthem the bulk of the third. When you return home, to what is left of your crumbled marriage, and head out to the garage you will find this 1973 Volvo 1800ES currently offered for $8,900 starting bid on ebay with 6 days to go, located in El Cajon, CA. Tip from Rene C.

"Drugs are bad, mmmkay." — Counselor Mackey from South Park Elementary School.

This Is Why You Don't Paint Your Volvo While High On Bath Salts

The thing about classic Volvos is that they tend to generate a dedicated, albeit small, following, and this particular tie-dye painted classic is no exception. The ebay seller offers parts for vintage 1800s and sells The Saint window stickers for your 1800 needs and is undoubtedly a member of the So Cal Volvo community. More importantly is that this car looks like a labor of love — a car that the seller wasn't planning on selling and not some quick flip with rattle canned air cleaner housing and pressure washed undercarriage.

This Is Why You Don't Paint Your Volvo While High On Bath Salts

DT's cub reporter Hunsbloger saw this very car at the Coronado cruise last week, you can see this methamphetamine inspired paint job next to the yellow car we featured for a roadkill specimen and you can see the yellow car in this seller's feature.

This Is Why You Don't Paint Your Volvo While High On Bath Salts

The seats look like the perfect thing to sit in while you are butt nekkid and blasted out of your mind on ecstasy, but I shudder at the number of Muppets needlessly slaughtered the these seats. Wasn't there a dumb cow roaming around and generating greenhouse gasses that could have been skinned for these seats?

This Is Why You Don't Paint Your Volvo While High On Bath Salts

All joking aside, this car gets featured here because it represents well restored mechanical bits and an interesting take on a customized vintage Volvo. If the paint is indeed as nicely done as the seller claims (hard to tell in photos with such a blotchy finish) then it could be a great way into the strangest car on your block...even if you live on the same street as Jay Leno and Jerry Seinfeld. If you don't like the paint, then this could be simply a quick respray away from a mechanically sorted, rust free and straight body 1800ES...not a bad deal at all.

Originally posted as 10k: This Is Why You Don't Paint Your Volvo While ...on Daily Turismo. Image credits; ebay.